/* Quote File Auto Converted to Arexx by Zonkerz */
xx=random(1,56,time('s'))
select
when xx=1 then a="You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track. "
when xx=2 then a="Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence. "
when xx=3 then a="Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition. "
when xx=4 then a="Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand. "
when xx=5 then a="If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. "
when xx=6 then a="The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm. "
when xx=7 then a="The attention span of a computer is only as long as it electrical cord. "
when xx=8 then a="An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing. "
when xx=9 then a="Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure. "
when xx=10 then a="All great discoveries are made by mistake. "
when xx=11 then a="Always draw your curves, then plot your reading. "
when xx=12 then a="Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget. "
when xx=13 then a="All's well that ends. "
when xx=14 then a="A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost. "
when xx=15 then a="The first myth of management is that it exists. "
when xx=16 then a="A failure will not appear till a unit has passed final inspection. "
when xx=17 then a="New systems generate new problems. "
when xx=18 then a="To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer. "
when xx=19 then a="We don't know one millionth of one percent about anything. "
when xx=20 then a="Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. "
when xx=21 then a=" A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make. "
when xx=22 then a="Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day's work. "
when xx=23 then a="Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book. "
when xx=24 then a="The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman. "
when xx=25 then a="To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most. "
when xx=26 then a="After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done. "
when xx=27 then a="Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under development. "
when xx=28 then a="A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works. "
when xx=29 then a="If mathematically you end up with the incorrect answer, try multiplying by the page number. "
when xx=30 then a="Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable. "
when xx=31 then a=".Give all orders verbally. Never write anything down that might go into a 'Pearl Harbor File.' "
when xx=32 then a="Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables the organism will do as it damn well pleases. "
when xx=33 then a="If you can't understand it, it is intuitively obvious. "
when xx=34 then a="The more cordial the buyer's secretary, the greater the odds that the competition already has the order. "
when xx=35 then a="In designing any type of construction, no overall dimension can be totalled correctly after 4:30 p.m. on Friday. The correct total will become self-evident at 8:15 a.m. on Monday. "
when xx=36 then a="Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches. "
when xx=37 then a="All things are possible except skiing through a revolving door. "
when xx=38 then a="The only perfect science is hind-sight. "
when xx=39 then a="Work smarder and not harder and be careful of yor speling. "
when xx=40 then a="If it's not in the computer, it doesn't exist. "
when xx=41 then a="If an experiment works, something has gone wrong. "
when xx=42 then a="When all else fails, read the instructions. "
when xx=43 then a="If there is a possibility of several things going wrong the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong. "
when xx=44 then a="Everything that goes up must come down. "
when xx=45 then a="Any instrument when dropped will roll into the least accessible corner. "
when xx=46 then a="Any simple theory will be worded in the most complicated way. "
when xx=47 then a="Build a system that even a fool can use and only a fool will want to use it. "
when xx=48 then a="The degree of technical competence is inversely proportional to the level of management."
when xx=50 then a="Any given program, when running, is obsolete. "
when xx=51 then a="Any given program costs more and takes longer each time it is run. "
when xx=52 then a="If a program is useful, it will have to be changed. "
when xx=53 then a="If a program is useless, it will have to be documented. "
when xx=54 then a="Any given program will expand to fill all the available memory. "
when xx=55 then a="The value of a program is inversely proportional to the weight of its output. "
when xx=56 then a="Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capability of the programmer who must maintain it."
